Thirty Thousand Days

By Gregg Krech

Have you ever had this experience?

Your alarm goes off and you find yourself laying in bed as your mind and body begin to awake to the morning. Your mind quickly gets into gear like a computer booting up when you hit the “on” button. Thoughts begin to arise. You begin thinking about the day, about everything you have to do today. Meetings, deadlines, phone calls that need to be made. You begin anticipating the overwhelming demands that life will place on you today. Periodically, your mind slips in a wild card, like, “I should have gone to bed earlier”, or, “why did I wasted my time watching that stupid TV show last night?” You think about your schedule. Your to-do list begins to take form like a genie mysteriously emerging from a bottle, but instead of granting you a wish it’s reminding you of how much you need to do today. When you finally emerge from your warm bed and your bare feet make contact with the floor you’ve created some fuel for getting the day started. But what kind of fuel is it? It’s the fuel of anxiety, of stress over how much there is to do. It’s the fuel of depression about how impossible this life is and how challenging the coming day is likely to be. It’s the fuel of self-absorption and anticipation – the fuel of fear that you won’t be able to handle what life will place in your path today.

Is this the fuel you want to use to get yourself going this morning?

An alternative is to use those first few moments . . .

by Gregg Krech

For many people Thanksgiving has ceased to be a celebration of thankfulness. Too often it is dominated by the pressures of family reconnecting, the worries over the meal, the seduction of football games and the overindulgence in an excess of food. Even if it is an enjoyable occasion, it may still do little to help us reflect on the good fortune of our lives and express our gratitude for those blessings.

So how do we reclaim a Thanksgiving spirit in our celebration of Thanksgiving? Here are a few ideas for changing how the day is designed. Not everybody will wish to participate in these activities, but you can suggest them and make sure you create enough opportunities for yourself to not only enjoy the holiday, but use it as a rekindling of gratitude as we launch the holiday season.

1. Invite those who are joining you for the holiday to bring a reading or quote that represents the spirit of Thanksgiving,

2. Spend 30 min. of quiet time in the morning reflecting and making a list of all the ways your life has been blessed this past year. Invite other members of your family to join you, even children

3. While you are cooking, reflect on all the efforts and lives that have been given to make your meal possible. Consider all the objects and types of energy that give you the opportunity to cook. Keep your attention focused on what you are doing and what makes it possible for you to do those things.

4. At the beginning of the meal say a grace.

5. Have a bell available on the table (or suggest that people clink a glass) that allows people to signal when they have something they would like to read or share with the group. When the person reads, everyone should pause from eating and listen. The readings should be short, a paragraph or less. This allows the spirit of Thanksgiving to continually arise while everyone eats.

by Gregg Krech

For the past twenty years I have been conducting retreats in which a person spends a week reflecting on his or her entire life (Naikan retreat). A participant always begins with her mother and a central part of the reflection is remembering the details of what was received from her mother from the time of her birth until the present day. But in many cases, the person’s mother has already died. On Mother’s day, how do we create a celebration for our mother when she is no longer alive. Here are a five possible ideas:

1. Spend time reflecting on your mother using Naikan’s three questions.

You can select a period of your life, generally a three year period before you left home, and spend 45-60 minutes reflecting on the following three questions

a. What did I receive from my mother?
b. What did I give to my mother?
c. What troubles and difficulties did I cause my mother?

2. Plant a tree or perennial in your mother’s name

At our retreat center, the ToDo Institute, we plant trees for people who become Life Members. Some of these people ask that the tree be planted in the name of their mother. We planted an ornamental cherry tree in the name of my friend Sue’s mom and each spring it bursts into beautiful blossoms.

3. Write your mother a thank you letter

Even though you mother may not be alive, you can still write her a thank you letter. Try to be specific and thank her for specific efforts she made (like the time she took you to the emergency room when you broke your ankle) rather than for generalities like cooking, housekeeping and care. What did she actually do to show you she loved you? You may wish to have a quiet ceremony at her grave or in your home to read your letter to her.

by Gregg Krech

"If you are a poet, you will see clearly that there is a cloud floating in this sheet of paper. Without a cloud, there will be no rain; without rain, the trees cannot grow: and without trees, we cannot make paper. The cloud is essential for the paper to exist. If the cloud is not here, the sheet of paper cannot be here either."
-Thich Nhat Hanh

Soon we will be lifting our heads towards the sky to witness the dazzling display of fireworks that marks the celebration of Independence Day. It's a wonderful opportunity to reflect on our good fortune of being born, through no effort of our own, on the soil of a country which offers us a great deal of freedom. We can easily take this freedom for granted. We mostly go where we want to go, say what we want to say, worship the way we want to worship -- and pay little attention to this gift of freedom.

But freedom is different from independence. Independence implies that we are not